It's been a week since I started feeling it. I brushed it all off like I normally do because every single day I get nervous and I see it as normal. And doesn't get in the way of the things I need to focus on. I am fine, I tell myself. But the other day, I felt like there's this big weight coming over me and then my heart started racing. There's this sudden jolt of sadness that took over me. I don't really know where it's coming from. Cause I was totally okay, at least I felt like I was until this happened. I was crying. I felt like my heart was torn into a million little pieces. It was overwhelming that I started messaging my friends and asked for a prayer, which I don't do normally.
And they all send in their concerns and prayers. They all did and I thought the breaking stopped for a while. I worked out for a good thirty minutes that day and I thought the breaking stopped for a while. I prayed and asked God for help, and I thought the breaking stopped for a while. I went to sleep and woke up the next day feeling the same. I spent time with God that morning. Laid to Him all that I feel. It felt good and I felt better for a good while. And now it's half past midnight and I hear my heart race as if I just ran half a mile. Lord, please heal me. I don't know what this is but please heal me.
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